B&Bs and Hotels in Portsmouth

Good Hotel Guide

Hostels and Hotels in Portsmouth

If you have a hotel in any of these locations then please contact us to list your hotel below, free of charge.

Bembridge, Bognor Regis, Cowes, East Cowes, Emsworth, Fareham, Freshwater, Gosport, Havant, Hayling Island, Lee-On-The-Solent, Portsmouth, Rowland’s Castle, Ryde, Sandown, Seaview, Shanklin, Southsea, Totland Bay, Ventnor, Waterlooville, Yarmouth, Newport, Chichester

For UK travelers going abroad, we recommend Tenerife, with feel of the UK yet all the sun of Tenerife. Read an extract below from More Ketchup than Salsa, the story of a English couple who left the UK to set up life in Tenerife. Info on how to buy the book can be found below.

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Below you will find short extracts from More ketchup than Salsa by Joe Cawley – not to be missed.

Short Extract

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Pedro was walking ahead of the Czech girl. Both had their heads down, looking glum. We all inched away from the window in order not to be seen. We watched them both trudge up the steps, still staring at their feet. It was only when Pedro was three steps from the top that he noticed the pile of black bin liners outside the apartment door. He stopped for a moment and gazed round, wondering if he’d come to the right apartment. The Czech girl had caught him up and began to look nervous again. She started to go back down the steps, but Pedro grabbed hold of her elbow to halt her retreat. Stepping round the bin liners he tried the key then knocked loudly on the door. We quietly opened Mrs Tanner’s window to hear the confrontation. Terry answered, his eyes ablaze with anger. Yes?’ he barked. Who are you?’ asked Pedro confidently, and in English. Who the fuck are you?’ answered Terry, taking one step closer to the Spaniard.

Bembridge, Bognor Regis, Cowes, East Cowes, Emsworth, Fareham, Freshwater, Gosport, Havant, Hayling Island, Lee-On-The-Solent, Portsmouth, Rowland’s Castle, Ryde, Sandown, Seaview, Shanklin, Southsea, Totland Bay, Ventnor, Waterlooville, Yarmouth, Newport, Chichester

The terrace had emptied except for two teenage lads attempting to impress the daughter from table five with their pool prowess. Her parents had left her with strict instructions to follow them across the car park to the hotel before midnight. With shoulders pressed back and pubescent chest thrust forward, she was obviously in no need of any posture advice and was lapping up the attention of the two pool sharks. Inside, Joy had her elbows on the bar, her head cupped in her hands as a couple kept her ‘entertained’. I switched off the kitchen light and went to join her for a much-needed nightcap. After pouring, drinking and pouring another pint of Dorada, Joy, whose eyes had long since glazed over, introduced me to the couple. Joe, this is Betty and Eric. They have a guesthouse in Blackpool,’ she said with feigned interest.

Monday night was David’s quiz night, when those who wanted to check if their cerebral matter was still working could test their general knowledge in teams of four. David was quite happy to spend a couple of his rare spare hours compiling 25 questions with a difficulty level varying from ‘What’s the nearest mainland country to Tenerife?’ (Most people would answer Spain, ten times further away than Morocco) to ‘Name the Ten Commandments’. Considering the prize was a bottle of the cheapest sparkling wine we could find, the competition was taken extremely seriously, with more than one competitor walking out, adamant that they were right and the quizmaster was wrong. It was Motown madness on Thursday night. Maxi Belle had recommended a soul act who, apparently, used to be in The Drifters. It was not an uncommon boast, half of the black singers who threw in the obligatory ‘On the Boardwalk’ into their set also made the same claim. If you believed all the claimants, the Drifters would have had more members than the London Symphony Orchestra, and that was just in Tenerife. Having seen his act, whether he was ex-anything or not, we couldn’t deny that he was good. Gene Alexander had an ultra-smooth voice, dazzling footwork and was one of the most professional acts that we had seen on the island. However, he didn’t come cheap, especially when he found out that he’d have to travel out of town to accommodate the Smugglers into his schedule. But Gene didn’t disappoint. He was a huge hit with the holidaymakers and many residents from far afield, who would make their only appearance at our bar on the Thursdays when Gene was performing. Joy’s theatrical aspirations were briefly fulfilled as she joined Gene in a dance routine that they had worked on for ‘Up On the Roof’.